Vestia's Wanderings
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Upon Vestia: Chapter Sixteen

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Upon Vestia: Chapter Sixteen - Page 27 Empty Upon Vestia: Chapter Sixteen

Post by Kooshie Mon Mar 13, 2017 10:56 am

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"All those aliens, always hyping up how great they are, and it always turns out to be a lie," James said sagely. "I'm not like that though, I mean I've been known to punch minotaurs. I'd be a proper villain, I wouldn't lose."
He watched as the guy went back into the train, "Ooooh nooooo. They so should not have done that. It is ON!"
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Upon Vestia: Chapter Sixteen - Page 27 Empty Re: Upon Vestia: Chapter Sixteen

Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:20 am

"wait.. they HAD A HORSE but turned him into a person rather than... WHY!??" Luka sputtered. "the old lady's nuts clearly. "

---

Kay shrugged. [I don't recognize any of these.] He admitted. [And you are, very fortune. Hormones, as I mentioned earlier today, are horrible.] He looked amused. [At least Skye's relatively sensible for a stupid teenager. ]

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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:24 am

"And the magic only goes until midnight. What if Cinderella wants to get laid after the party? It's terrible," James grumbled. "She's an android, she probably doesn't, but STILL. RUDE."

~~
Asher found Checkers. Might as well play that. "Yeah, and the guy didn't seem too terrible. Other than being a bit embarrassed and silly," he said.

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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:28 am

"Well if she's gonna get laid she doesn't need the dress." Luka laughed.

---

Kay shrugged and helped set up the game. [So long as nobody suggests it's their duty to repopulate their species.] he shook his head. [Still, it's nice to know there's other hawk Artruvans here. It gives Skye and Moone some familiarity and common ground, if they're going to be staying here it's nice to know there's others to look out for them.]
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:43 am

"She might want it so her new boyfriend doesn't know she's a servant," James said. "Plus he'll get an iffy reputation of she leaves wearing that torn up dress."

~~
Asher shook his head. "Those two are far too young to repopulate, and I do hope they know it." He smiled, "Yes, it's good that there are others like them."
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:45 am

Luka laughed. "well that's why you fling the dress aside before midnight, and then are all mortified you can't find it, so he finds you something to wear and sneaks you out. " She nodded.

---

Kay nodded. [If they don't, I have pamphlets. So many pamphlets.] He looked pleased.
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:49 am

"Accidentally throw it out the tower window in your enthusiasm and say a horse must have eaten it?" James suggested brightly. "Cinderella would look hot in a guy's clothes anyway," he nodded.

~~
"You need to give me some of those pamphlets to carry around," Asher said, setting up the Checkers board. "We'll make sure all these overly enthusiastic folk use protection or abstinence." He looked amused.
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:51 am

Luka nodded. "Exactly!"

---

Kay looked amused. [Maybe we should decorate the communal areas with the more family appropriate ones. Or just leave them in the bar area. The kids never seem to go in there.]
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:58 am

Cinderella was off to the ball! She went in and nobody recognized her, and the moment he saw her, the prince immediately had eyes for no one else. The stepsisters tried to figure out who this girl was, but the guards kept everyone away from the dancing couple.
"They don't talk much, to each other. Cinderella and this guy are way more into extended eye contact."

~~
"Yes, put pamphlets in the bar, and the med bay on a counter. We can also make some PSA posters," Asher said, "How great condoms are and what other options you should consider getting next time we visit a planet. Tasteful posters with nice friendly print, nothing mean or gross."
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 10:31 am

"Maybe her magic aunt gave her telepathy and they're having some in depth conversation across the room?" Luka suggested.

---

Kay smiled broadly. [So no warnings about space stds then?]
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 10:33 am

"Oooh," James said. "That's one heck of a magic aunt. Cinderella's a lucky robot."

~~
Asher laughed. "If you can think of a way to talk about space STDs that won't be too graphic or traumatic, be my guest."
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 11:53 am

Kay smirked. [I can try.]

---

"She is." Luka agreed. "oh no, it's nearly midnight. Quick! hurl your stuff out the window so he won't see it turn to mice!!"
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 11:59 am

"I'd like to see that," Asher said. "Maybe the space crabs euphemism was a good idea. Something that follows you and ruins your life. We could think up something like that." He laughed quietly.

~~
"Runrunrun Cinderella!" James called as the clock began striking midnight. Cinderella started fleeing. "Guess it's too late to hook up now, darn it," James said.
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 12:20 pm

"Drat, she should have telepathically given him her number." Luka suggested. "Why ARE her shoes made of glass? you'd think those would be really uncomfortable."

---

Kay nodded, musing over what was as traumatic as space crabs.
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 12:24 pm

James snickered. "Android, remember? She can't feel how uncomfortable the shoes are." He added, "Or she's one of the badass androids from the other universe who don't care if their shoes are terrible."

~~
Asher drummed his fingers on the table. "It's hard to get better than space crabs," he mused. "Space leeches? Symbolic of diseases that make your weak, or of babies?"
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 12:39 pm

Kay shook his head [Alien parasitic babies might be a little to on the nose.] He thought. [that said, the image of leeches in private regions or the hint of it could be pretty effective.] He smirked, this was fun. No wonder the imperium had so many of these pamphlets, their board meetings were probably just like this.

---

"good point. Still, I hope they're toughened because if some idiot steps on your toes, you got some real problems." Luka chuckled.
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 12:49 pm

Asher smiled at the idea of what to do with the leeches. "As long as the children don't see that or we don't make it too obvious, that might work." He nodded sagely, "Subtle, tasteful leech usage."

~~
"Well they are magic, and they survive being run about in, so they must be great shoes," said James.
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 2:02 pm

Kay laughed his silent laugh. [We may traumatize the crew for good.] He smirked. [Good.]

---

"I'll leave glass shoes to androids." Luka decided with a nod.
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 2:11 pm

"If it saves us from having to deliver more babies, that can only be good, right?" Asher said in a sensible tone.

~~
"Yeah, maybe that's a good idea."

The prince sent out a declaration for all the maidens in the kingdom to try on the slipper that had fallen off. Cinderella got locked in the tower and cried. The mice and birds tried to get the key to her room up the stairs to her.
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 2:20 pm

Kay made a face. [Yes, I think if I can avoid another reminder of why i'm so so grateful to be male, the better. those who say childbirth is beautiful are delusional or have never actually witnessed birth.]

---

"So she's honestly the ONLY person in the whole kingdom with size 5 feet? like.. really? " Luka protested. "Why doesn't he send out a summons for any girls who look like her? Wouldnt' that make more sense? or did he spend all night just looking at her feet? oh man... he has a foot fetish doesn't he? "
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 2:59 pm

"Oh, but don't you like reasons to be grateful?" Asher joked.

~~
"He totally has a foot fetish. That magic aunt was a smart lady," said James, "she ensured Cinderella's future just like that."
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 3:04 pm

Kay smiled. [I think i've had enough reminders to last a lifetime thank you. ]

---

Luka snickered. "He doesn't even know what her face looks like. Man, he probably wouldn't have even noticed her dress. Hey, why didn't her shoe disappear anyway?"
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 4:05 pm

"Yes, maybe one delivery is enough to instill a permanent sense of gratitude in us," Asher agreed with a laugh. "I'm pretty happy I'll never have to do that myself, certainly."

~~
"No idea why the shoes didn't disappear," James said, "But it's sure a good thing they didn't."

The Duke was trying the shoes on the stepsisters! Then they dropped the shoe and it broke! But then Cinderella got the key and came down with the other shoe, which they tried on her and it fit!

"They didn't consider that it might be a counterfeit shoe," said James.
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 4:34 pm

[Technically i've sat through two, but thankfully the first one I was too young to really be involved. ] Kay shook his head, it was, perhaps rather depressingly, one of his earliest clearest memories. Yeesh.

---

"See! It's not toughened glass! If he'd danced with her and stepped on her toe her foot would be shredded!" Luka pointed at the screen. "Who makes fake glass shoes? Maybe he just recognises her sexy sexy toes." She laughed.
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 4:41 pm

Oh yes, Kay must have been there for Esk's birth. "You have my condolences," Asher told him.

~~
"Okay, you're right. These shoes are a terrible idea," James agreed. He shook his head, "Movies back then had plot holes the size of Jupiter--that's the biggest planet in the Sol system, by the way."

But now Cinderella and the prince were riding away in a carriage and Cinderella's old horse was leading the way!

"Look, NOW he's being a horse," James huffed.
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 4:54 pm

Kay smiled softly [to my mother's credit, I don't recall much screaming. ]

---

"We sure that's the horse and not like, the family cat?" Luka joked.
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Post by Kooshie Wed Mar 22, 2017 5:05 pm

"That's certainly something to be grateful for," Asher said. "I only ever helped with first aid and fetching things for doctors back at the space station, so thankfully Heny was the first birth I witnessed first-hand." The videos he'd seen were informative and unpleasant, but they still didn't count.

~~
"Good point. I really have no idea any more," James said. "This movie messed with my head, it's crazy."
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Post by flying_purple_monkfish Wed Mar 22, 2017 5:19 pm

Kay nodded/ [I'll take amputations and plasma burns any day thank you.]

---

Luka grinned. "It was a fun ride though."
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